Okay.

Tuesday.

Today has been rocky so far, as it always is when I travel. I was not very motivated to get out of bed, but then I remembered I would never have to use that horrible shower that is irritating my skin ever again.

Got all my stuff packed by had to leave my leftover snacks behind. Sad day.

Then, you know, travel time.

Is there ever a time in my life when I come to an airport and things don’t go wrong in some way, shape, or form?

No.

So the good news is… I got my extra luggage into storage with success. No problem there.

The bad news is… my Uber driver canceled my ride, drove around the block, and re-charged me the same amount for the same ride. Jerk.

This caused me to miss my check-in deadline by 20 minutes, which meant I missed my flight and had to rebook it. Luckily, I am a member of the airline rewards program in question, so I got on the next flight without any issue. I did get charged for it, which sucks. Next time I’ll remember to buy the insurance.

The good news is that now I have accrued even more frequent flyer points, so the next flight is free! Hurray!

Next stop: Lounge perks.

Anyway, that bit took so long that by the time I got through security, which is very fast here in HK (especially if you’re a resident, like me), it close to boarding time. Of course I had just enough time to make a stop at the bar to recover from the stress of all of this. Go me.

I can hear my dad’s voice in my head saying, “This is why you always get to the airport five hours early.” Okay, well, maybe once I accrue enough frequent flyer miles to get lounge access, I will be motivated to actually show up 5 hours early.

Anyway, off we go to the Den of Iniquity. How fun this shall be. My first priority is to get a grilled cheese with ketchup. I know it sounds gross, but it’s really not once you’re in Asia. At least the cheese is Thailand is realish. I swear to god they 3D print the cheese here in HK. I gotta pay so much extra to get the real stuff. Ugh.

Next priority: interviews and content. We’re not doing the Wild Farang thing this time (famous last words). We are serious. We are professional. We have filled our quota of random hook-ups and beautiful, inspirational muses for a lifetime.

This is serious.

I’m definitely going full Fluff Piece Mode for this. Reviews of Irish Pubs. Someone wants to publish that story. Sat down last night and made a list of all the pubs, wrote out a list of non-controversial questions, and then crossed three of the places off my list.

Why?

One is just way too far and I’m not going to waste my metro card fair on that. The second I have already been to and have been told it is the “worst” one, so they’re all going to be competing with that. The third is on Khaosan Road. I refuse to go there. It’s not for me. And by that I mean, it’s for dirty backpackers in their early to mid-20’s and the creepy older men who pray on them. I’ve been down there once and I just would rather never return ever again. I’m too old for that shit.

Non- negotiable.

The others are all grouped together in various neighborhoods I’m already familiar with. So I planned it out by the day to just run my Rabbit card, explore the neighborhoods, and collect interviews along the way.

Very serious. Very professional.

Then again, it’s Bangkok, so it could go off the rails at any moment in time. You never know.

Here’s to hoping we don’t run into the Hot Beef Stew. Or maybe we do want to, just so I can walk right up to him and get all up in his face like, “Hey there, you lying liar who tells lies. Remember how upset your were that I was ‘making up stories about the lads at the end of the bar?’ Well guess what? I made up a whole story about you. Wanna hear it? It’s basically Bridgerton fanfiction where you’re the handsome, mysterious stranger who dances with our heroine all night long, transforms back into a stag, and fucks off back into the forest forever. What do you think about that, huh, huh. You stupid bloody wanker!”

Hahahaha.

Asshole.

What can I say? I’m a Scorpio. I hold my grudges for a very, very long time. He could have avoided this by just telling me the truth, but no. He woke up and chose chaos that day. Why, we don’t know. At least I can say I was upfront with him. I definitely told him this is who I am. Again, he chose chaos by responding to my truth with nothing but a pile of lies.

Asshole!

He better hope his bitchass doesn’t see me.

Let’s just say that.

As for the other one I was worried about, he better not get all up in my grill. I will read to him aloud from this dumb story I wrote until he gives up and goes away. He doesn’t exactly strike me as the romance novel type. This plan should go well.

Anyway, I need to get to the gate now so I don’t miss my flight again. Have a nice day!