Namaste! Greetings from India! Here we are, chillin’ in a literal effing palace, living my best Bollywood Royals life! What was that guy’s name again? I already forgot. It doesn’t matter. I have to change it anyway. So did he! Even he isn’t who he says he is, lol.

I rose with the sun and did an extra long yoga practice. So amazing to just do yoga and not teach it. It hits extra hard in India. I feel amazing. And I’m about to feel even better because I just booked a two-hour luxury Ayurvedic spa treatment with all the bells and whistles. Hell to the yes. Show me the hospitality!

I am spoiling myself. One, because fuck that Indian guy for running his marriage scam on me, and two, the USD/INR conversion is insane and that’s why I’m taking advantage of it to live my best Bollywood Royal Life! Yaaaaassssss Queen! I earned it, I deserve it.

So my last night in Dubai was… really something! LOL! What is that city?! I’m honestly low-key obsessed with how ridiculous it really is. I don’t even know what that trip was. It was like something from the White Lotus, and I was here for every minute of it.

How do I even begin to explain what happened? I don’t know. I need to get breakfast first.