Friday morning. Sitting out on the balcony with my coffee. Just got off the phone with my brother. I miss him so much. I miss my cat. They’re both doing okay, but still, I miss them…

Got my next trip planned, so it’s time to start booking things. I’m just moving slow today. Probably because I spent most of last night wrapped up in my special quilt crying my eyes out over the future. Sometimes you just gotta feel your feelings.

I’m worn out. I’m tired. I’m already sick of moving around constantly. I don’t want this. This is not why I came here. I picked Hong Kong because I wanted to stay in one place for a year. I wanted to live in a big city and have one job and make new friends and just vibe. Instead I’m dragging my suitcases from country to country, lost and alone with no clear purpose. This is not what I signed up for. But I have to do it. There are stories here that need to be told. I need to go to these places and learn. I can’t just sit on my ass and watch the world pass me by.

Well, good news, Rare Pokémon finally updated his Instagram stories. I could finally see him IRL instead of just remembering his vacation persona. Thank god. I knew we weren’t right for each other. We are two completely different people with two completely different lives. His lifestyle is not the lifestyle for me.

So now that’s out of my head. What a relief. I’m sick of these guys taking up valuable space in my brain. I need that space for other things.

For what, I don’t know. Fighting fascists, I guess?

Who knows.

Who knows…

I keep thinking about it and I’m like… I’m doing too much right now. I need to make some cuts to the plan. Just thinking about it makes me feel tired. Let’s just focus on Vietnam right now and worry about Malaysia and Cambodia later.

Okay, done. Decision made. Vietnam it is. Slow travel is the way.

I’m ready to go back to bed now. I’m so exhausted. I have no energy at all. I am just completely drained.

I should probably check the weather before I go. I can’t remember off the top of my head what part of monsoon season we are in. Ugh.

I just wanted to stay in one place for a year. I should have done more research on that stupid company beforehand. But here’s the thing… I did do the research. I just didn’t believe the reviews. I thought, “Oh these people are just spoiled and entitled and don’t want to work hard.” No, this company just fucking sucks.

I’m gonna take a nap and start my day over when I wake up. I’m just… ugh. I just want to stay in one place and work one job for a year. I don’t understand why I keep ending up in these absurd situations where I can’t just make this happen for myself. It shouldn’t be this hard.

Ugh.

Goodnight, sweet prince.