Monday morning.

Happy Indigenous Peoples’ Day to All My Relations!

Here at the coffee stand. There were bananas on the table I like, so they moved them for me to sit down. The people are so nice here. They love that I come here to write every day. I’m happy to support this little local business, especially when the evil empire known as Starbucks looms across the way.

I saw the lady’s white boyfriend who also comes here every day at the condo the other day when I was with the ex-military guys. I wonder if he has gossiped about it yet to the cafe ladies…

I woke up today and felt a little bit different, not gonna lie. different is good. I completed my trio, so everything after this is basically just a bonus.

I did some Yin Yoga to work out more of the tension in my shoulders. I don’t have a good routine down yet. I just go with the flow and twist whichever way feels good at the moment.

While I was in meditation, I saw the British Guy appear. He was dressed like a Roman, sitting at home in his library with his cats. I asked him why he was wearing a toga and he got very pedantic and explained that it was a tunic made from organic cotton and it was very nice to wear in the hot weather.

He then asked, “Feeling better now?”

“Yes.”

“Then why are you still here?”

“Because I made you into a character.”

“Why? For what purpose? To what end? What is this for?”

“I don’t know. Because I like you. This is what I do when I like someone. It’s the only way I know how to be.”

He didn’t say anything, so I just woke up again and went on about my day.

It is raining now. I don’t particularly feel the need to move from my table, even though I am sitting outside. There’s a pretty solid tin roof above me right now. I was here the other day when it was raining pretty hard and it didn’t bother me. I should be good chillin’ out here for awhile.

I started watching this show Netflix recommended to me last night about a modern day Thai actress who falls through a wormhole in time and ends up a courtesan at a brothel. Now this is the kind of content I pay exorbitantly high prices to see. The production value is not quite as high as Heeramandi, but it’s charming in its own way. I love a good period piece.

Still thinking about my weekend outside of the unexpected sex marathon. Since I was hanging out with a pair of older men who had each been married and divorced multiple times, I decided to ask them some questions about certain incidents with men that have been on my mind.

First, I asked them about Levi Gene, who you may recall is the not-so-gentleman who was on his way to a divorce when he picked me up in a skeezy dive bar. He was unable to pull the trigger himself, so I ended up in a shitty situation where I was humiliated by him and used my anger to track down his soon-to-be-ex-wife and send her back his dick picks. They divorced pretty much immediately and we all moved on with our lives.

These guys said that yes, he did use me to get out of his situation, and that “he should have sent me a gift basket with a thank you note. That would have been the classy thing to do.”

I agree. This is literally what I was saying all along. I literally said he should have sent me a gift basket. I am the genie who granted his greatest wish and he could not even be bothered to send me a gift basket in return. Both of them should have sent me gift baskets, tbh. I did them both a favor. So ungrateful and classless. Smh.

Then I asked them about the British Guy. I asked, “Why would he pay someone to be his girlfriend?” They said, “You don’t pay someone because you want their company, you’re paying them to go the fuck away. He sees no real value in her as a companion, so he’s paying her to get the fuck out after he gets his dick sucked so he can be alone to do whatever it is he does.”

Well, okay then. I guess I’ll just leave him alone in his library to translate his little collection of scrolls. I’m sure his rendition of the Epic of Gilgamesh will be a masterpiece. An instant classic for the ages.

Now I understand, lol.

I didn’t ask them about anyone else. I didn’t have any other questions at the time. I’m just curious about the true nature of these transactional relationships. I truly strive to understand male behavior, mostly because I am usually subjected to it in ridiculous and unfair ways.

Now the rain is pouring down. Good thing I ran back and grabbed my umbrella before I left. I didn’t grab my sweatshirt though, which I regret.

There is a chick walking around wearing this beautiful polka dress and I just keep thinking to myself how much I hate my wardrobe right now. I have this pile of clothes, it’s super heavy, and all of them just make me look like I’ve taken a permanent vacation from reality. It’s like I don’t even know who I am anymore right now. I just want to throw it all in the bin and start over again.

Okay, well, we all know I can’t afford to go shopping until I find a new job, so that has to be the priority now. We took care of all the needs. Time to level up on the pyramid and take care of the self-actualization aspect.

Off now. Have a nice Monday. Celebrate your ancestors today!